Giving a fck vs not giving a fck

A lot of people have asked if my new book (published July 2024), “The Joy of Actually Giving a F*ck” is a counter to Mark Manson’s, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.”

We’re both saying you can find more peace and happiness in life. Essentially, one says you obtain it through giving more fcks, while the other says it’s about giving less. 

So let’s dive into the similarities and differences.

Titles and Central Ideas

My Book: The Joy of Actually Giving a F*ck

Think of it as a love letter to kindness! It’s all about how amazing things happen when we care about each other. We’re talking boosts to mental health, a happy heart, a support to the immune system, and a kinder, gentler world. Plus, kindness? It spreads like glitter!

Manson’s Book: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

Mark’s all about zen and minimalism. He’s saying, “Hey, don’t stress about the small stuff!” Focus on what truly matters to you and let go of the rest. Less stress, more happiness.

Approach to caring

My Book

I’m all for caring about each other. Deeply and often. Checking in, shows of support, words of encouragement. They go a long way. It’s a call to action against growing nihilism and apathy. When we look out for each other, we create an awesome network of support and encouragement.

Manson’s Book

Mark’s approach is like a decluttering guru for your brain. He says, “Pick your battles.” Care deeply, but only about the stuff that really matters to you rather than spreading themselves thin by caring about everything. It’s like Marie Kondo for your emotions! Selective caring to reduce stress and improve life satisfaction.

Mental Health Vibes

My Book

I’m saying that kindness and caring are essential for well-being. Giving a f*ck about others enhances mental health by strengthening connections, reducing loneliness, and creating a support system. And it makes your brain happy! It’s like a mental health smoothie packed with all the good stuff—love, connection, and a sprinkle of joy. And kindness even rewires your brain for happiness. I’m saying be kind and you’ll find it easier to be happy.

Manson’s Book

Mark’s mantra is peace through prioritization. When you stop worrying about the unimportant stuff, stop caring about superficial and societal pressures, instead focusing on your own values and priorities, your mental health gets a serious boost. It’s about finding that inner zen. Mark is saying, prioritise your fcks and you’ll feel happier.

We’re both saying you’ll be happier, but our how to’s are different.

Impact on Society

My Book

Kindness creates a ripple effect, like tossing a pebble in a pond. One act of kindness can spread and create a wave of positivity. My book positions kindness as a countermeasure to societal negativity and isolation. It’s about building a kinder, happier world together.

Manson’s Book

Mark’s focus is more on you and your personal journey. He’s saying, “Get your own house in order first, and the rest will follow.” It’s less about society and more about your own personal development. The primary focus is on individual happiness and fulfilment.

Countering Trends

My Book

We’re going against the tide of not caring and nihilism. My book showcases the benefits of caring and being kind. It’s a rallying cry to reconnect with our humanity and each other. I’m aiming to inspire readers to reconnect with their humanity and each other. Because caring? It’s cool!

Manson’s Book

Mark’s fighting the trend of overstimulation and societal pressure. By caring less about the trivial stuff, you free up space for what really matters to you. It’s like hitting the reset button on your stress levels.

Style and Tone

My Book

Think warm hugs, cheerful vibes, a dash of inspiration, written in a light, encouraging, and supportive tone. It’s all about the joy of caring and the benefits it brings.

Manson’s Book

Blunt, funny, and a bit cheeky. Mark’s here to give you some tough love and a good laugh while helping you figure out what truly matters. He uses straightforward language to challenge conventional self-help advice.

In a nutshell

Both books offer valuable insights but from different angles. 

My book is your go-to guide for spreading kindness and joy.

Manson’s book is your manual for cutting out the noise and focusing on what truly matters.

Together, our books present a balanced view: while it’s important to care deeply, it’s equally crucial to be selective about what we care about.

So this blog isn’t a ‘mine-is-better-than-yours’ piece. I love Mark Manson’s book. You don’t need to put someone down so you can get ahead. In fact, there’s a section in my book on how to win in life without someone else having to lose, so I’m really big on finding the merits in each other’s opinions and approaches, so that everyone gets a slice of the pie.

Ultimately, whether you’re looking to give more f*cks or fewer, there’s wisdom to be found in both approaches. 

Now go out there and make the world a kinder, more focused place!

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